Yup, that's basically it.

Sunnyside up.

I do enjoy Kelly Clarkson.  Two of the girls on The Voice performed her "Since You Been Gone" on the last battle round tonight on NBC. I love that show. I also love Kelly Clarkson. She's one of my faves. 

I played a lot of trombone today. It was great. One week til I'm back in California. Let's hope it is sunny this time.  I also got another job today. At Indochine. I swear it was the easiest thing ever. I walked in cause I saw a "now hiring" sign just to ask for an application, but after the manager talked to me she hired me on the spot. haha That was easy!

Life is looking up, I must say.  The sun came out today. I got to play trombone outside. Nothing I love more. = )

Love is the greatest refreshment in life. - Pablo Picasso

Life is about 3am walks with friends who can't sleep.  Meeting new soul sisters.  Listening to music that makes you want to cry even more and then making a new play list that makes you want to dance.  Working hard and playing harder.  Putting your heart and soul into everything you do. And I do mean everything.  Growing even when the rain never seems to stop.  Trying new experiences.  Pouring your heart out even if it means rejection.  Not giving up on hope.  Keeping an open mind.  Sharing what you have to offer.  Praising Jesus. Laughing at yourself even though you heart is breaking.  Perseverance.  Taking that run even though you're scared of failure and completely falling on your butt.  Getting back up even after you fall.  Never hiding who you are.  Keeping your word.  Being honest.  Flying hundreds and thousands of miles to see family.  Being there for friends.  Staying open.  Keeping the faith.  Crying at the end of a yoga session because that's what your body wants to do.  Following your heart.  Most importantly? Love.  

1 Corinthians 13:13 - Now these three things remain: faith, hope, and love.  But the greatest of these is love.

Making Banana Pancakes. . . .

Ok so I'm not like Jack.  I didn't make banana pancakes.  I made Blueberry Banana Oat Muffins.

These yummy creations are so easy to make and super clean and healthy.  They call for 3 cups oats, 1 cup coconut milk, 1 tbls baking powder, 2 eggs, 3 bananas, 2 cups blueberries, a little honey to sweeten, a little vanilla, and some cinnamon.  You just mix everything sans oats first and then once that is all good, you add in the oats.  Bake at 400 for 20-25 minutes.  The recipe makes 12 muffins (6 servings).  Yummy!!!

I went to this yoga class with my friend Brandy yesterday.  It is crazy how much you have to face your emotions in a yoga class. Every feeling in your body just surfaces.

I also got my nails done again yesterday! :)  Heidi Paxman = AMAZING.  If you live in the 801 you should really let her do your nails.

Check out her super cool website!

I went skiing today.  Yup. Skiing on May 27.  WHO DOES THAT?!?!! Haha  The more I go up to the mountain, the more I think I really just might stay here in SLC after I finish my masters.  It is truly incredible.  And where else can you drive 25 minutes and be on snow this time of year?  = )   My dear old sweet (note the sarcasm yet?) precious friend that took me up for that first ski lesson had no idea the monster he was creating.

Last night Heidi and I watched Madea Goes to Jail.  She had never seen any of the Tyler Perry movies, and I needed a good laugh.  Oh dear is that movie funny!  I love it. = )  If you need a good laugh you should watch it.  It is the only one on Netflix that is streaming.  Hallelujer!

Laughter is the best medicine. What team are you on, Curtis? Havin fun.

"Just do your best.  It's the only way to keep that last bit of sanity. Maybe I don't have to be good, but I can try to be at least a little better than I've been so far."   - The Avett Brothers

Where in the world is Temecula?

Went to some wineries today.  Super cool.  We went to two. Keyways Winery and Briar Rose Winery.  I think it is so crazy how two  different vineyards within 6 miles can have such different wines! I'm taking 3 bottles home with me to the SLC.  Well I sat down here with the intent of writing more tonight, but I just don't wanna.  Maybe I'll come back and add more later?

update:

Yeah I figured I'd be back.  Random thoughts:

You live. You learn. You re-evaluate. You move on. 

Live life one day at a time. Take life as it comes, and realize that tomorrow is a another day and another chance. 

Sitting, Waiting, Wishing.

Now I was sitting waiting wishing
That you believed in superstitions
Then maybe you'd see the signs
But Lord knows that this world is cruel
And I ain't the Lord, no I'm just a fool
Learning loving somebody don't make them love you

Must I always be waiting waiting on you?
Must I always be playing playing your fool?

I sing ya songs I dance a dance
I gave ya friends all a chance
Putting up with them wasn't worth never having you
And maybe you been through this before
But it's my first time
So please ignore
The next few lines cause they're directed at you

I can't always be waiting waiting on you
I can't always be playing playing your fool
I keep playing your part
But it's not my scene
Wont this plot not twist?
I've had enough mystery.
Keep building me up, then shooting me down
Well I'm already down
Just wait a minute
Just sitting waiting
Just wait a minute
Just sitting waiting

Well if I was in your position
I'd put down all my ammunition
I'd wondered why'd it taken me so long
But Lord knows that I'm not you
And If I was I wouldn't be so cruel
Cause waiting on love ain't so easy to do

Must I always be waiting on you?
Must I always be playing your fool?
No I can't always be waiting on you
I can't always be playing your fool.

What if I was wrong (Part Dos)?

Ohhhhhh. Samsonite!  I was way off! 

Brilliant Laughs

So I'm in San Diego.  Happy Birthday to the Motherload! :)

But last night my mom, my brother, and myself went to this Improv comedy show. Oh my gosh I don't remember the last time I laughed so much.  It was positively hilarious.  I even got to chit chat with some cool folks that work there. I guess I've never meet a stranger, and the fact that I'm from Alabama is usually a great conversation starter on the West Coast. I really want to go to another improv show. Anyone know of any in the Valley?

Tonight we went and ate at this awesome Indian restaurant in the Gaslamp part of town.  I got this awesome paneer dish with green peas and curry.  It was spicy and delish.  After din-din we went and watched Bridesmaids.  Oh. EM. Gee.  I thought it was so funny!  I want to see it again.  Not many movies I actually feel like I need to see it again in theaters. Finding Nemo was the last one, way back in high school.  Saw it 3 times in theaters.  If you haven't seen it yet, go!

hahahahahahahahaha

How people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours.

Not that I believe in karma, but I feel like that's a pretty good thought.  I will never understand why people lie.  How people can be so hurtful.   It just doesn't make sense to me.  Not one bit.

Learn to forgive those who hurt you because holding a grudge will bring you even more pain.

Too much?

I feel like I blog all the time these days.  And I have no clue who reads this thing. I don't think I really care. Sometimes its just nice to have an outlet.  To see my thoughts in words.  It is almost therapeutic.
I read this awesome quote today:

If you keep brooding over the past your future is surely lost. ~Franc Roy

Isn't it true?  

How many hours have I wasted?  Days? Weeks? Wasted time on things I can't change. 

Who knows.  I realize I am way over analytical.  I do it all the time.  Especially these days when I actually have free time in my life.   It is so easy to get lost in your thoughts when you have an extra hour to sit around. 

Pretty Toes and Stolen Phones

I have this lovely new friend, Heidi.  Heidi has her own business called Stilet-toes.  She's so freaking cool! = )  She did my toes this morning.  I got, get ready for this, HOUNDSTOOTH on my toes!  lol I'll post a picture as soon as I can.  Well after getting my toes done (and picking up her CUTE 4 year old son at preschool) we went to eat lunch at the Cheesecake Factory.

Duh duh duuuhhhhhhhhhhh.

  This is where it went down.  My dear Cheesecake Factory let me down.  Somewhere in between the parking lot and our table my phone was stolen. Kidnapped! Abducted!  Taken against its will and held at massive gun point.  Okay so maybe not held at gun point, but you get the picture. After returning to the car and realizing that the phone was CLEARLY not there we searched and searched.  Then we bombarded the precious Iphone 4 with like 20? 25? phone calls.  Well, said THIEF answered the phone once, but said nothing.  Then answered the phone a second time. Again nothing.  The third time this lovely individual answered the phone they proceeded to make crude and obscene sounds into my the phone.  NEAT!  = ) 

Well that's all I've got for now.


Life is good.

Tuesday Morning Thoughts

These days I wake up and I have all of these thoughts and emotions.  My heart and mind race from the moment I am awake.  Sometimes I don't know how to handle this.  On a day like today all I want to do is run some of this energy out and go into super drive, but its cloudy, raining, and cold in Salt Lake today.  What will today bring me? I'm determined to not sit in a dark room and listen to music today.  In my heart I am determined to be an eternal optimist.  My thoughts swirling around in my head this morning want to believe the opposite.  I need God's grace today. 

Plans for today?
Play trombone. A lot. 

Go to the field house.  Run a mile (finally starting to build some strength up in my knees again), ride for 25 minutes, and do some abs. 

That's about it.  We'll see what happens. 

This weekend is brought to you by the letter B.

What a weekend to remember.  Hmmm...or not.  Maybe the right phrase is this weekend was pretty unforgettable.  Why, you ask, is this weekend brought to you by the letter B?  Well I'll tell you!
 
B is for Bedbugs.

    Good night. Sleep tight. Don't let the bed bugs bight. Can I just say how much CREEPIER that statement is after actually experiencing bedbugs?!?!?!?  Yes, I had bed bugs. The little coniving creatures completely took over my cute little studio attic apartment.  It was awful.  AWFUL.  They were everywhere.  I woke up one morning to find them all over my bed.  I tried to call an exterminator, couldn't find one right then so I figure I would call again the next day.  I figured, surely those little creatures won't have found my futon in that little amount of time. Boy was I wrong.  I almost cried, no I did cry, when I found them on that side of my apartment.  So that night I slept behind my desk on my airbed, and prayed they wouldn't find me on the wood floor in the middle of the night.  Again, wrong.  So I finally got the exterminator on the line.  Spent the night at a friends house, and then on Satureday afternoon (after skiing, of course) the exterminator came and sprayed EVERYthing.  Then fog bombed the apartment killing each and every(cross your fingers)one of those little jerks.  It was awful.  I wouldn't wish those bugs on anyone. I had to wash everything in my apartment and keep it in garbage bags until the apartment was sprayed.  Every article of clothing, every towel, every sheet, etc.  Let's just say it took forever.  At least now my wardrobe is completely clean and all my spring clothes are out of the box!  So glad, so so glad to have those things gone.  I might scream if they come back.  Seriously. 

B is for Buca di Beppo! 

    So for those of you who haven't heard I recently got a job at Buca di Beppo.  Now normally I wouldn't apply for corporate restaurants, but lets face it, a girl's gotta pay the bills!  To be honest, so far it has actually been a lot  of fun, and really no different than working for family owned joints.  I'm diggin the people, and have already made some cool new friends.  I've been training all week.  been there at 4 everyday since Tuesday.  I've already racked up 30 hours this week. My first check is gonna be killin.  And by killin, Im hopin to at least cover a majority of my next month's rent.  Well see how this first paycheck goes.  I might be on the lookout for a second job.  Hmm or I could just really market myself as a trombone teacher? Who knows.  The plus side of training at a corporate restaurant?  While you train, you eat for free.  The only food I have paid for this week is the poppy seed muffin I bought with my iced-coffee this morning.  I have enough Buca in my fridge right now for 4 meals.  Insane.  It is a good thing that free food thing only happens when you're training, cause other wise I would literally blow up.  I'm kinda looking forward to getting back on some strict clean eating.  In fact, I just got the newest Clean Eating magazine.  Stoked. 

B is for the Bird. 

    The Snowbird that is.  Snowbird is now on their late spring ski hours, i.e. they are only open on Friday-Sunday.  :(  Oh well. There is always next season! :) Haha.  On Friday I went up with my pal Owen.  It was so fun.  I don't believe I can put it into words how much I am growing to absolutely loving skiing.  To be on God's creation and to just soak in the beauty of it.  There is nothing like it.  When I'm on the mountain I feel like everything is going to be okay. 

   On Saturday I went up by myself.  People who ski/board are so cool.  I almost perfer going skiing by myself.  (I don't know though cause I change my mind every other time, haha).  I so enjoy meeting other skiers, and sharing lift chairs up with new people.  It is so fun to hear other peoples' stories.  Here's the thing about skiing by yourself, well at least for me anyway... I get so used to being on one run.  Heck, I'll do the same run 5 times and be completely content in it.  Most the time, at least so far, I usually wait until I'm with someone who knows the mountain pretty well before I go explore a new route.  People can tell me I should try something and will be fine, and it isn't that I want someone to hold my hand while I discover a new (to me) part of the mountain, but it is so nice to have that comforting feeling that someone is there with you who knows what to expect. To be with someone who has been down that road before.

      Well every now and then I get a little adventurous. Sometimes that adventurous streak has led me to trusting myself more, while other times I feel like I put myself in a situation that is over my head.  Growth occurs in both of those situations.  Saturday was an awesome adventure day.  I tried some "new" parts of the mountain.  In Mineral Basin there is a black run called High Stakes.  I've watched people do it from the lift a million time, and finally decided to give it a whirl.  The first time I did it, I've got to admit, I was scared out of my mind!  It was a little steeper than I thought, and a little scary, but I made it down without a scratch or yard sale.  I'm not the kind of girl to back down from a challenge. I don't give up.  I always try something twice before I decide on my feelings for it.  So, true to my nature, I went down it again.  The second time felt so much better! I knew what to expect, but I still went slow.  There was an older gentleman skiing close to me.  At one point I stopped before a steep section, and being the polite skier he was, he also stopped. I smiled and told him he was welcome to go ahead of me because I knew I would be going pretty slow down that section.  He told me I was doing a great job (I'm sure it was obvious I'm still a rookie at this whole ski thing) and asked if I would mind a quick pointer. Well of course I would love one! He gave me a few tips, and when I told him it was only my second time going down the run and I'd only been skiing for about 2 months he was so impressed and really made me feel good.  He said he couldn't believe I was already doing some of that stuff and was so new to the mountain.  :)  After the pointers, my third run on High Stakes was an absolute blast!  I am so looking forward to next winter.  (I can't believe I just said that. I hate the cold!  Guess Utah and skiing are changing me a little.)  I can't wait to get really good  at skiing and be able to explore the WHOLE mountain.  After my third run on High Stakes I moved over to the Road to Provo where I went a little farther out then I usually go.  I had so much fun checking out some other parts of the mountain.  Hands down, my best day skiing so far.  Here is to even better days to come!

B is for Burgers. 

    I love Sundays. Absolutely. I love my church.  K2 is an amazing place to worship. The church keeps me in check and on track. I feel so blessed every time I attend. I am so blessed that I have to opportunity to give back and serve the church by volunteering at Adventure Canyon (teaching 3-6 grade Sunday school).  I have been so blessed to meet some absolutely amazing people through Adventure Canyon.  I usually teach every Sunday and share the class with two others that rotate, Katrina and Mark.  I ran into Katrina after the early service this morning (it wasn't her Sunday to teach with me) and she invited me to come to Pioner Park with her after the last service was over.  There is a pretty large homeless population in SLC and every 3rd Sunday, K2 goes down to the park and provides a meal for them.   We had cheeseburgers, potato salad, beans, salad, chips, and cookies.  I helped set up and helped serve.  What an amazing time to be outside (again, just enjoying God's beautiful creation) and help some folks out.  I got to meet some more really amazing people today and had a great time.  I can't wait to help out again.  

Lessons learned this weekend:
- I am not self sufficient, and  I need God in my life.  I tend to forget that.  I think I've got everything under control.  I want to believe that I am the ruler of my life, but let's face it.  It just isn't true.  He is more than enough for me, and I will follow where He leads. 


- Greater things are still to come, and greater things are still to be done.  Yes, those are lyrics from a Chris Tomlin praise song.  Sometimes I get so caught up in my own self absorbed trials and tribulations that I forget that God has a plan for my life. 


- Sometimes God has to break you down to build you back up again.   Paul spoke about rejoicing in your trials.  He didn't mean scream and holler and be happy that you are going through hell.  It is never happy to be in something like that.  He meant rejoice in what is to come, because God has a plan.  Rejoice in the fact that God can build you up again, as well as what is to come because of the trials you experience.  Greater things are still to come. 

What if I was wrong?

I can’t promise you that I won’t let you down.

And I can’t promise you that I will be the only one around when your hope falls down.

But we’re young, open flowers in the windy fields of this war torn world.

And love, this city brings the plague of loving things more than the creator.

I ran away.

I could not take the burden of both me and you.

It was too fast,

Casting love on me

As if it were a spell I could not break

When it was a promise I could not make.

What if I was wrong?

What if I was wrong?

Oh, what if I was wrong?

But hold on to what you believe,
In the light, when the darkness has robbed you of all your sight.

And, oh hold on to what you believe,

In the light when the darkness has robbed you of all your sight.

And now this land means less and less to me without you breathing through its trees.

At every turn, the water runs away from me and the halo disappears.

I’m not whole when you’re not near.

So what if I was wrong?

What if I was wrong?

Oh, what if I was wrong?

But hold on to what you believe,
In the light, when the darkness has robbed you of all your sight.

And, oh hold on to what you believe,

In the light when the darkness has robbed you of all your sight.

So hold on to what you believe in the light. . .

With grace in your heart and flowers in your hair. . . .

I feel like this song was written just for me. 

Some food for thought. Quotes to remember. . . .

I've got my God; He speaks to me every day. Some things I just can't work out, so I leave them be. Even if I think they're wrong, because I know, that one day He'll make me understand. I've got that trust; it's called belief.

Live recklessly.  

Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced.  - Lucille Ball 

Never let success get to your head, and never let failure get to your heart.  

Take chances. Tell the truth. Sing loud. Tell people how much they mean to you.  Regret nothing.  

You can't be brave if you've only had wonderful things happen to you.  - Mary Tyler Moore 

People will forget what you said. People will forget what you did. People will NEVER forget how you made them felt.  

And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count.  It's the life in your years. - Abraham Lincoln 

It is better to cross that line and suffer the consequences than to just stare at the line for the rest of your life.

A broader look. . .

I am heartbroken tonight.

I have no right to complain about anything in my life. 

I am so lucky.   I have a beautiful studio loft apartment.  I have the opportunity to finish a masters degree within a year from now.  I have my health.  I have enough.  I am never hungry.  I have a church that I love and lifts me up.  I have some of the most beautiful souls in the world as friends.  As many self absorbed sadness-es and sorrows I want to believe that I have had, I have never had to face true sorrow or torment.  Never had to face true devastation. I may have felt like I've lost everything from time to time.  Again self absorbed.  I have friends in Tuscaloosa who have lost everything.  One of my teachers and advisers at UA lost everything in the storms that hit just days ago.  And she isn't the only one.  So many people have lost so much. Seen so much pain.   

Tonight a beautiful soul left this earth.  Anna fought long and hard with leukemia.  She was a fighter.  What an amazing fighter.  She is an inspiration.  Loved by so many.  I don't even know what else to say. 

Love and prayers go out to the Gordon family right now and the future.  I, along with hundreds (if not thousands), just wish I could give them all a hug.  Prayers for peace and understanding. . . for all.  

Prayers and of course, love. 

Sad today.

“Lived unbruised we are friends…” 

What does that mean to you?  To me it means that it’s so easy to be friends.  To not put yourself out there… To take the easy way out.  Heart break and bruises are the risks we take.  What a sad life, to be so afraid of something that could be so sweet. 

Nobody said it was easy, but no one ever said it would be so hard.

Love will not betray you, dismay or enslave you, it will set you free.

Don't know why I'm posting so many songs these days. Guess it just feels right.  =P  

New playlist.

Piece of My Heart....Janis Joplin
Life is a Highway....Rascal Flatts
Dumb Girls...Lucy Woodward
Your Heart is as Black as Night...Melody Gardot
Who Will Comfort Me...Melody Gardot
Set Fire to the Rain....Adele
Rolling in the Deep...Adele
Womanizer....Britney Spears
Last Name....Carrie Underwood
F**k you... Cee Lo Green
Love, Save the Empty...Erin McClarley
London Bridge....Fergie
Hot N Cold....Katy Perry
I Kissed a Girl....Katy Perry
Firework....Katy Perry
California Gurls....Katy Perry
Last Friday Night....Katy Perry
Ur So Gay....Katy Perry
Never Again....Kelly Clarkson
All I Ever Wanted....Kelly Clarkson
Whyyawannabringmedown....Kelly Clarkson
Maybe.... Kevin Hammond
Crazy....Kevin Hammond
BulletProof....La Roux
Just Dance.... Lady Gaga
Raise Your Glass... P!nk
When I Grow Up.... The Pussycat Dolls
(Sittin' On) The Dock of the Bay....Sara Bareilles
Come Round Soon.... Sara Bareilles
That's Not My Name....The Ting Tings
Untouched...The Veronicea
Take it Off....Ke$ha
The Remedy (I Won't Worry)....Jason Mraz
S**t Song....Kate Nash
Boogie Wonderland.... Brittany Murphey
Fergalicious.... Fergie. 

Today is an Adele kind of day.

I dare you.

And always, no matter what, always wear a helmet. . . .

What an amazing day. Truly.  It has been fantastic.

I've learned some valuable lessons today.

1. Skiing alone is fun, and I am more than capable of enjoying God's creation by myself, but man is it fun when you have friends along for the run!

2.  The run might seem safe, and flying down it recklessly might be a great time, until you hit that one hitch. Oops!  And man did I hit a hitch!  Total yard sale. Already got a few nasty bruises cause of that hitch. There was one ski, then 2 yards, then another ski, then 3 yards, then there was me. Just sitting there. Ouch!  Good thing I was wearing that helmet. Not sure I would have been sitting up at all if I hadn't been wearing that thing! Safety first, my friends, safety first.

3. When someone invites you to dinner, go.  Studying can always wait.  That's what Red Bull is for! = )

4.  All piano sonatas do not, in fact, sound the same, but that's a different story for a different day.  

5. Life is a highway, I gotta ride it all night long.

I answer to many names. . .Tatum, Lisa, Tater Tot, Roll Tide, Taters, Julia, Sunshine. . . .just to name a few.
I wear my heart on my sleeve.  With me what you see is what you get.  I would never wish harm upon anyone.  Sometimes I truly don't understand things, but one thing I do understand is me. . . .well most of the time anyway!  ; )  I refuse to do anything less than follow my heart or my dreams, and I will never, ever stop.

Like skiing today. Oh man, did I take a fall. Actually, I'm still hurting a little from that fall.  Maybe I'll take something for that . . . .     But the point is, did I quit after that painful failure?  No. Of course not.  Because that would not be me.  Sure maybe I went slow the next few runs, but that's just how it goes.  And yes, I am going back to the Bird tomorrow.  Who's gonna come ski with me?

Just remember, always, no matter what, wear a helmet! = )

Love

Rocking my inner Liz Phair